New Beginnings

I think it's been a while since I actually post something positive. Today, I feel happy. Hubby has been gone this weekend (not that I am happy he's gone or anything..Just happy he's off doing something that makes him feel good.) It's been just me and the little guy. I forget how much I love to spend time with him. He's growing so fast, and asks such adult questions sometimes. When I am with him, I feel like I definitely need to be the grown up, and protect him no matter what. I try to give him his space, and remember that he's a child. It's not as hard as it seems, and during golden moments, it's nothing short of a moment with my own son. I know he's not my own child, but sometimes, I feel like he is. I wish he were.

Anyhow, yesterday we took my folks out for my Mom's 60th birthday. I had this great "birthday picnic" planned, starting with a quick jaunt over to a townhouse that I wanted to look at. I dragged my folks and the little guy out there with me, (which isn't far from where we live now) and I was so plesantly surprized! I loved it. It's small and of course like most bay area housing priced accordingly to where we live...(which means a lot for those living outside of CA) Amusingly, I watch HGTV and just wanna jump off a bridge when I see the gargantuan houses at the prices the buyers are buying them for, and watching them squak about the prices!!!! It's actually totally ridiculous. Anyhow..not to dampen this glorius moment or anything...but I LOVED this aforementioned place. It was cute, sunny, decently priced (considering) had all the rooms / bathrooms I wanted, but apparently had some inspection issues, so I will need to delve a little deeper. But I think we might want to make an offer, I know hubby will love it too. My folks loved it too, which was a little shocking to me. My Mom, will love whatever I love, she will always find something positive about it. My Dad, however is the opposite. He will usually find something wrong with it and warn me against it. This time though, they both loved it. The little guy skipped around discovering little dreams of his own, living there. Worried about which high school this would land him at I am sure, but quite excited nonetheless. Or maybe I was just so bubbly with excitement that I read it everywhere I looked??

After that, we went to Vasona park, which was my master plan the whole time. We got totally lost trying to find it, and FINALLY after much low-blood sugar/ driving-lost tension we stumbled onto the parking lot of my favorite park. I had visions of my Dad and the little guy riding the little train together, my Mom and I smiling, sprawled out on the grass in the shade...and come to find out....IT WAS CLOSED! Due to this gigantoid fire in the vicinity, it was being used as a Firefighter central command station....I mean c'mon guys..Labor day weekend, couldn't they find another 100 acre wood elsewhere in the million dollar hills to reconvene? Cursing under my breath, and trying to keep a smile on my face. I whizzed off back to our hometown, to a downgraded park with palm trees, a funny little blue pond, and lots and lots of grass for running, sprawling, croquet, and frisbee.

On Friday I bought this amazing super duper fast frisbee, for oh, $10. It was so amazing that only after a few minutes of tossing it around, it landed itself into the funny little pond and sunk straight to the bottom...Sigh...At this point, I gave up control, or lack there of it...

We wrapped up the night with a viewing of "Balls of Fire" which turned out to be stupidly funny, and mildly entertaining. It kept the little guy, my Mom and Dad giggling, so that's all the really mattered to me. AND Mom actually stayed awake! So I think I might've picked a winner.

Overall, it was a great day. I can't help but fantasize about being a homeowner, with our own home, and an extra room for **the baby** or future baby I should say. But still, even actually seeing another room for a potential office is music to my ears, I am so tired of having my desk in the living room for all the world to see, or balk at since I have been a disorganized pig for the last 4 years or so. I don't know what happened. Maybe I got lazy? Maybe I am too tired to clean, I don't know. I just know that trying to keep everything in its neat little place just isn't working out here, since we're rapidly running out of space. Here too, I have given up control. I just try to keep a close watch on that ever-growing mammoth pile of laundry over there in that corner...I don't mind the washing, its the folding that gets me....

I don't want to get my hopes of owning this **perfect little home** but I can't help it. We've already made offers and have been out-bid two other times. Let's not get me started on the real estate market around here, I really don't feel like crying in my coffee right now...Let's let visions of sugarplums dance through my head...At least until Thursday at noon, when the seller starts taking offers...