When I was skinny

I was sucha lil snot
I didn't have to hold my breath in
and my t-shirts I could knot.

I was a lot nicer to everyone around me,
I didn't eat garbage like, starchy food and candy
I had a way of holding up my head
now I just sigh heavily and pull the sheets o'r my head.

It sometimes makes me sad
to think of the body
and the tush that I had.
I was strong and lean
a cardio machine
back in the days of yore...

Now that I feel fat
and feel grossness of my
body starting to sag.
I am overcome with grief
and stricken underneath
when I look at body
that once wasn't so bad.

"It's STRESS!" I declare
as my wardrobe taunts me
with sheek tiny slacks
that I no longer wear.

"But, it's only ten pounds!" You state in anguish
doesn't matter at this point,
as I am crabby and famished,
from all the stupid diets
I fail at, and later seeth in my quiet
despair and self-loathing....

I run, and I lift, with Speedie's and with Biff's
and don't make a dent
with my one-day a week, schedule, Oh yes, I'm bent.

"It's the job!" I transpire,
as I tread home to retire.
I sit my ass down, and momentarily conspire,
to somehow pull myself out of this mire..