Crazy Cat Terroizes Connecticut Town

I am rolling around laughing my ass off. See below:

Wed Mar 29, 7:24 AM ET

FAIRFIELD, Conn. - Residents of the neighborhood of Sunset Circle say they have been terrorized by a crazy cat named Lewis. Lewis for his part has been uniquely cited, personally issued a restraining order by the town's animal control officer.


"He looks like Felix the Cat and has six toes on each foot, each with a long claw," Janet Kettman, a neighbor said Monday. "They are formidable weapons."

The neighbors said those weapons, along with catlike stealth, have allowed Lewis to attack at least a half dozen people and ambush the Avon lady as she was getting out of her car.

Some of those who were bitten and scratched ended up seeking treatment at area hospitals.

Animal Control Officer Rachel Solveira placed a restraining order on him. It was the first time such an action was taken against a cat in Fairfield.

In effect, Lewis is under house arrest, forbidden to leave his home.

Solveira also arrested the cat's owner, Ruth Cisero, charging her with failing to comply with the restraining order and reckless endangerment.

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Phew...

Okay, I actually did the math and I am still ahead, by about 500 calories. I don't know why, I just eat when I am stressed. And all this wedding maddness and making sure I fit in my dress, blah blah blah. I am stressing myself out...I guess I miss the days when I was a slight size one. I miss those days when I could throw on a pair of jeans and whatever top I wanted because they weren't tight at the hips! Yes, the days where the jaw line was more emphasized and make-up looked different because there was less face...

489 + 1040 = 1589 - 540 = saftey zone 1049

Trying desperately to stay at about 1136, but man it's tough.

Okay, I have definitely thought about this too much..

The Wild Orca

Damnit. Damnit. Damnit. How come that word is spelled with an "n" I find that incredibly annoying...

I hate undoing any good that I have done for myself. This week, I have stuck to my guns and worked out every morning at 6ish. I have utterly impressed myself. Being the non-morning grumpy queen that I am, I have proved myself wrong. But somehow by 2 or 3 o'clock I have managed to undo all my hard earned, sweat dripping, burned off calories. Today, I have managed to devour the entire planet in just one sitting. I ran for an hour, yay, kudos to me, I am finally back on track, and have done weight training every other day, it's been a pretty rigorous schedule to stick to, but man oh man am I sore. But maybe it's stress, house-purchasing jitters, wedding jitters, new job stress. I dunno. I am like 1000 calories over my diet plan for today, and am bloated like a wild orca. Great, now my very preggers best friend, is threatening to stuff a chocolate souffle down my throat after dinner tonight. Quick, lemme find the nearest building, so I can jump, and end this diet-obessive drama.



I actually do hate thinking about it so much, but I hate not fitting into my clothes even worse...and somehow, I can't cut the carbs. They're like a sneaky group of gangsters, corning me at every turn..Okay...so I stuff myself and then get pissed off at the world....God, I am soo horrifically mental about so many things right now. The honey called me "hormonal" this morning, and I was ready to launch a whole set of knives at him. Good thing we were on the phone, or else he might decide to not marry me, after seeing my head make a full rotation...

Maybe one of these days, I will try to eat and eat and eat, and then eat more. I will do my very best to eat every carb in sight so I can relish in my wild orca-ness, and then see how I feel...Wait a minute..I did that just last weekend....


I wish I knew how to post pictures on this darn site...I guess I could research it, but I am simply just too lazy. I am so ready to go home. I thought it would be a very productive thing, to try and do my laundry on my lunch hour...WRONG...seven loads, two lottery tickets, a bag of cinnamon graham crackers, a roasted chicken wrap, diet coke, and two strawberry pop-tarts later I find myself cursing the fact that we don't have a working washer. And why in the hell is it that people at laundromats are friggon crazy?! We're all there for the greater good, yet some people are just whacko. I get it...Maybe it's God's way of telling me that it's time to gather up all my quarters and run to the nearest Sears and splurge on that fancy 500 million load capacity washer that I am salivating over...It's like I feel like I am being punished every time I take all 7-9 loads of my laundry to wash it..why is that, it's so weird. Not to mention that after over-eating and getting annoyed at every funny look, I almost completely missed a meeting at work....I already got here about a half hour late this morning. I am just feeling so stinkin' out of sorts today...

Arg...

Oh Yeah

I think I just found my wedding ring!!! It's just a matter of making it happen now. The honey has been diligently seeking out rings that he thinks I would like. He's been scouring the web for me...so sweet...

Purty isn't it?

I just got The Time Traveler's Wife from the library. I am tired of spending money on books that I read really fast and then just leave lying around.. So I discovered the beauty of being frugal. :D

Two whole days of doing nothing...ahh..okay I am doing quite a bit of somethings, working out, cleaning, searching for a new washer...wedding stuff. Hair cut tomorrow Yipee!!!!! I can't wait. My hair salon that I go to es tres chic. Johnnie cuts my hair, isn't that perfect? He kills me, he loves curly hair and does miracles with my wild tresses. I feel like I am in a wonderland, I don't know what to do next, should I run in the rain? Should I continue to feed my ever consuming need to calculate my caloric intake? Should I throw caution to the wind and go have a sundae?
Heck, I might even go get my nails done! Me...miss-I-can-do-everything-myself.

I am resurrecting my open mike conglomerations. I am pretty jazzed about that. They've asked me to do a reading this Thursday, but alas, it will be my first day at work on the new job, and I must leave the lines free for any sort of post work anxiety I might go through. Although I don't expect my day to be short of walking on clouds, I like to give myself some room to breathe.

To feed the every increasing big show epidemic in myself I attended my second Strikeforce event. It was the first time CA ever legalized MMA fighting, with a record breaking event at the HP Pavillion (formely known as the shark tank) about 18K people showed up, in a very long, very exciting, Mixed Martial Arts event. It reminded me of when the honey and I went to Vegas. I felt all hyped up and excited after my first UFC fight. I loved watching their techniques, their submissions, and their knockouts. Although I get irritated when men try to "box it out" so to speak, some people just aren't as strong as they'd like to think and should stick to grappling....At this fight though, Frank Shamrock put on a very good fight Cesar Gracie was in no way, shape or form prepared for that match. Shamrock knocked him out in the first 21 seconds of the first round. We met him and his brother Ken in Vegas a while back. They are really nice in person. Speaking of rounds...man those ring girls wear damn close to nothing. I suppose if I were turned on by them, I would've thought they were hot...Reminds me of what the honey's bachelor party might look like...Ugh, I don't even want to think about it..

Man I was on the edge of my seat for a whoping 4 hours. After l left, I swore I should've been born a man. After a lot of beer, and blood gushing punches and kicks we headed off for Brittainia Arms in downtown SJ. One word..ghtetto...
It was fun, although I did have to say it was rather nice having 6 rather large, and muscular men at my aid when a little pee wee tried to grab my ass. Ahh, the feeling, it was fantastic. The honey was especially sweet, after a few drinks he's so silly. We danced, it was fun.

We did manage to roll into a Taquria (ok my spanglish sucks) I ran into an old sorority sister of mine, very cool, nice chatting with her again. Later we walked back in freezing rain to our hotel room. It was certainly a fun night. I proved myself wrong, I am not, nor will I ever be "one of the guys" but nontheless, it's nice being a little feminine, and able to adapt to being with only men, and no women..It's funny men are so much more fun when they drink..I did manage to stay away from really caloric, "girly" drinks, and stuck with light beer the whole night..

Gotta run, laundry and lunch await me.